Disclaimer: This blog post contains references to drugs, alcohol and self harm along with physical and maternal mental health and anxiety which may be distressing or triggering for some readers who may be struggling, know someone who is currently struggling or who may have struggled in the past.
It's a blog revival baby, and what better way to kick it off then sitting down with some of my favourite kick ass women.
Welcome to THE DRIVE where I chat with some amazing and absolutely driven, passionate ladies who are doing some really cool things and who have some really incredible messages.
I first met Lea online in a local business group and her online presence was so huge because everything she said was just so intimately honest and raw and you just NEEDED to become her friend.
I was super excited to meet her for the first time at a studio launch to celebrate Maddieson from Fleur and Mae Photography and she was as radiant and had just as much presence in person as she did online and boyyyy does she rock those Little Party Dress outfits!!
So, what does she do?!
Lea founded Tired Glitter Co for the tired Mums who need a little sparkle!
With a really strong focus on maternal mental health and creating a supportive community for Mum's struggling (or who just need a group of women to lean on in this crazy journey we call motherhood) whether it's your first, second or eighth child - Tired Glitter Co is that Mum friend that is guaranteed to be a shoulder always there when you need it.
Not only is she creating a beautiful community, Lea has also created a stunningly bright and bubbly motherhood and lifestyle brand at the same time who churns out some beautiful, colourful graphic tee's that scream positivity and strength along with fun accessories (designed by both Lea and collaborating Australian artists) for those days that we sometimes need that physical reminder!
When it came down to crunch time and me wanting to drag some people along for a ride - it was a no brainer that I had to rope this beautiful girl in.
Ok, Let's pull out the big guns: You have an INCREDIBLY strong message to tell, what was the pivot point that you knew that YOU needed to be the change?
Aaahhhhh, Good question!
There was no pivot point per se. It was more of a gradual build.
My whole life I felt unsupported, having issues with mental health I would self harm, turned to drugs and alcohol and then when I became a Mum I knew I needed to find a way out to be the Mum I wanted to be - but when I reached out... I felt there was no real help for Mums who were struggling with mental health issues.
I remember being on the floor of my kitchen crying, I called beyond blue and they could only pass on resources that I had already accessed and only gave surface level 'support', they recommended calling the mental health unit at the hospital but they refused to help me because I wasn't at risk enough. I was holding myself together ENOUGH not to self harm, for my sons sake, so I wasn't in dire need in their eyes.
It took me years to figure out how to support myself and I just never want another human to feel that.
Wow - that's tough and I absolutely felt the same.
I had so many people tell me that I just had the 'baby blues' and brush it off - but it's been five years and I feel like I've kicked ass on my own as best as I could!
I've taken a lot of quiet steps over the last six months and ONLY in the last three months have I been able to leave the house by myself because I just couldn't physically do it, which knocked me down heaps because I saw other Mums on social media taking their kids to parks and on play dates and the whole lot and I had no reason for it - I just couldn't physically do it and the only time we saw people was when they came to me.
It's really tough to be in that place and my biggest regret is not reaching out to anyone to let them know that I was struggling like that.
You're creating SUCH a beautiful community now though and encouraging Mums to share the gritty bits on social media which was been a HUGE breathe of fresh air - how does it feel to be so vulnerable, which must be bloody scary, and then see other Mums follow your lead and be able to admit that being a Mum is HARD and show "the down days"?
Jesus, I feel that. I haven't been leaving the house for 18 months now and I can barely physically shower! It's the chronic fatigue though and although I feel frustrated and down about it, I don't feel the depression as much anymore since getting on top of the health stuff which has made a huge difference- thank god!
But, I think growing up the attitude was always to toughen up, feelings weren't validated and it felt gross. So I knew becoming a Mum that being vulnerable and sharing my emotions was one of my top values and I guess I carry that through all of my interactions now. I'm not scared when I'm being vulnerable, especially when it comes to admitting mistakes and apologising because I learn and grow so much through doing it.
I do however worry about oversharing, seeming too whiney or saying the wrong thing - but I'm sure every person who's struggled with anxiety can relate to that!
It's an amazing feeling when others respond because they relate and feel validated. I love being able to do that for people.
I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue in high school and didn't finish because of it - so I feel you there! It's definitely a tough one on those bad days!
You do it in such a positive way though and I absolutely love your attitude towards everything - not to mention the humour - Like those TikToks with your man also are just SO relatable for a goofy relationship and make me laugh so hard!
You're also raising your family alternatively though - which is really cool to read about! Does it take any more 'effort' or is it just simply changing your habits and something that you just 'do'?
Oh wow! I didn't know that! I literally only got my diagnosis last week but I've definitely had it since I was 16. I trialled anti-depressants in 2019 though and came off them early 2020 and I think they made it worse. I don't feel like I've had a 'good' day since.
I guess the changing of habits does take effort, but I make practical changes.
Like I won't go making every damn thing from scratch but more just eliminate what's causing issues and aim for good enough! I find my priorities and focus on them and don't add on loads of anything else.
It's like having a morning routine, if I list out a big thing about doing a 30 minute work out, writing in a gratitude journal and whatever else - I'll see it as too hard and do nothing.
Instead I focus on having my herbal tea every morning and that little thing makes a WORLD of difference.
That's SUCH a good attitude to have and the little things definitely do make a world of difference!
I searched for and tried so much to 'change' me during the hours that I was awake that it all just sounded too hard. Now I'm lucky that I don't technically start my day until 10am after the first days naps for the kids and just go with the flow from there which has made a huge change without that pressure alone!
What are you doing to make these small changes, to make these Mums lives easier and seem less scary when they might be overwhelmed and putting this pressure on themselves?
Being relatable and sharing the real motherhood behind the 'highlight reels' of social media, so that they know that it's not just them and it's ok.
We also avoid the 'positive vibes only' messaging with my feel good tee's because I like to think that I advocate for feeling ALLLLL the feels and being honest about that. I think the power is in owning and growing through the tough things instead of forcing on a happy face.
I aim to build a community for Mums to lean on and support them to make small, practical changes to make their lives easier.
YASSSSS FOR OWNING AND GROWING!
Motherhood is such a huge adjustment and your message is just brilliant - how are you reaching out to new Mums who NEED to hear this?
At the moment it's really just social media and collaborating with other businesses that I feel are doing amazing work for tired Mums.
Word of mouth is super important too!
Word of mouth is incredibly powerful!
To finish off though - What's the best advice that you have for a Mum who's trying to do it all?
You can't do it ALL and if you do then you'll burn yourself out.
Instead pick your priorities - Mine are my health, family and then my business because it's my passion and fills my cup!
With everything else - see what you can simplify or outsource like a cleaner, friend and family support or even a meal delivery and then cut out whatever doesn't align.
I love that and it's usually easier said then done and can take some serious guts to admit that you CAN'T do it all!
Tired Glitter Co invites any Mums that are looking for that connection, support or just a community that they relate to - to join the Tired Glitter Co community by visiting any of our social media pages, keeping tabs on our website for all of the goodies to make your life feel a little brighter or to join the Tired Glitter Co Community Facebook Group!
You can find Tired Glitter Co here:
Website - https://www.tiredglitterco.com.au
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/tiredglitterco
Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/tiredglittercocommunity
Instagram - tiredglitterco
If you, or someone you know are struggling, please consider reaching out to your GP or Lea directly who can assist in finding the right resources for you.